Inspiration in Desire

By Bud Koenemund

For Lindsay

I fear, Lady, it lies not within my
Power to make you immortal through words
Spilled forth upon a page. Rhythm and rhyme
Fall too short ‘fore thy grace. Prose is absurd;
Found deficient ‘gainst the scope of beauty
Displayed both inside and out. Such discourse,
Oft’ repeated, will turn stale; a duty
Poets must embrace, lest their vows seem forced.
For thee, Muse, I am compelled to create;
Finding inspiration in desire –
A passion that may never be sated.
Yet, here, I strive to raise thy fame higher.
   Crafting true praise remains my endeavor;
   As I seek to make you live forever.

Orpheus and Eurydice

By Bud Koenemund

For "Her."

At first sight, beguiled by your beauty,
I became lost in imagination;
Creating art for you – not a duty;
Rather, some blessing of inspiration.
Through this privilege, I sought sacred words
That would enter your ears to captivate
Heart and soul, heedless of the cost incurred;
For passion made me a fool; prostrated
By indifference – over and again.
My mournful songs echo your absence,
While grief traps love in an underworld, straining
To hear footsteps; finding only silence.
   But, unlike the tragic story myth tells,
   With each look back, ‘tis I return to hell.

Every Generation Remembers

By Bud Koenemund

For those who do not know peace.

Every generation forgets
Stories their fathers told; evoking horrors
Beyond the pale of humanity; debts
Recalled with cold sweat; mem’ries forever
Seared into their minds; invisible scars
Borne; never quite healing despite years passed.
This curse entices the young toward valor;
A supposed glory they think will last.
So, those terrible lessons must be learned
Again; steeped in blood, and death, and madness;
Where the dead are free, but survivors yearn
For solace: a peace they’ll never possess.
   Each age is destined to fan war’s embers:
   Every generation remembers.

How Much of Me Must Burn?

By Bud Koenemund

For “Her.”

Heat endures, though I wonder if it’s worth
Fanning embers of a love that’s dying;
Going cold by neglect, and growing worse
When it seems I’m the only one trying
To rekindle those bright flames of passion –
Once incandescent – desire that burned
In our souls. Shall I accept affection
Will never revive? The respect I yearned
For denied, my heart glows on a pyre
Since your scorn; while what sanity remains
Is condemned to the maelstrom of Hell’s fire.
True, I offered all… and would again;
   Yet, a tragic question lurks in that storm:
   How much of me must burn to keep us warm?

Seen

By Bud Koenemund

For Lindsay

"In the right eyes, you will be art." - Unknown

How could any set of eyes miss the art
Contained within you? Even those who don’t
Create illumined by you feel your heart:
Acknowledging grace as artists are wont.
Though it is, in truth, the job of poets
To praise beauty; ‘tis thy inspiration –
Arising from your spirit, more than my wit –
That gives birth to these celebrations
Of radiance. All things, seen and unseen;
Love and lust; denial and desire;
The chaos of black, white, and gray between,
Feed the maelstrom of a mind set fire.
   I must give credit where credit is due:
   The world will know these words belong to you.

The Green-Eyed Girl and the Supermoon

By Bud Koenemund

For Lindsay

The green-eyed girl, like some ethereal
Being, gliding, ghostly in the moonlight,
Guided him across the sand. The feel
Of her hand, warm and soft in his, delighting
Every sense, while his intellect failed;
Yielding all to love, lust, and lunacy.
Reaching the water, she turned, her face veiled
In shadow, and kissed his lips eagerly.
His arms enveloped her, pulling her close –
A beauty, wondrous, to rival that bright
Body celestial – Nature’s awe exposed;
In sky and on earth, a heavenly sight.
   But, like all dreams, this vision could not stay;
   On waking, fantasy faded away.

Half

By Bud Koenemund

Half of my heart is still in love with you;
A notion foolish as it is sincere,
When that affection’s forever imbued
By sadness: growing more and more austere.
Half of my mind is still in love with you;
Yet condemned to recall happier days,
‘Fore passion incandescent went askew;
Leaving intellect and sanity razed.
Half of my soul still belongs to you;
Though ‘tis now mortal – crushed beyond the repair
Time can grant; a solace long overdue –
As I stumble about in my despair.
   I seek a peace I fear I’ll never find,
   While memory and shadow intertwine.

A Warrior Poet's Soul

By Bud Koenemund

For Christina Alvarado

My mind cries out, profaning the universe;
Mourning, o’er and o’er, this tragedy –
An assault on existence – while cursing
A suppos’d caring god’s perfidy.
I wish I could hold you in my arms now;
Embracing gently; a reassuring
Touch to defy despair and doubt; somehow
Granting peace – a balm easing suffering.
But, I know the strength you possess: spirit,
Resolve, stubbornness, and tenacity;
With a warrior poet’s soul. Sans fear,
You’ll tilt ‘gainst fate for immortality.
   I have and will always love you, my Friend;
   Sentiment which shall endure ‘til time’s end.

From Dust to Dust

By Bud Koenemund

Why would I fear something I have wished for,
Even tempted, nigh on 25 years?
What suffering exists beyond abhorred
Death’s veil that could eclipse pain endured here?
I should welcome an end to this torment –
The unceasing agony called life – which
Has left both intellect and body rent;
Bereft in spirit; with a soul of pitch.
Unafraid, I hold surrender not a sin;
I’ll embrace the darkness; finally
Set free from worldly struggles; whole again,
Someplace where these griefs no longer bind me.
   From dust, to dust, and thus a debt is paid
   When I, at last, am by the Reaper bade.

When Forever Doesn't Mean Forever

By Bud Koenemund

Words often evolve over centuries;
Rising and falling while meanings altered.
Some are lost in language’s vagaries,
Disappearing, to be re-discovered
In not-always-ancient texts; re-defined –
Even the victim of mistranslation –
Gaining life hence as lexicons refine;
Embraced for use by new generations.
But, I believed one word inviolate;
Sacred and immune to fate’s quickening;
Spoken always without fear or regret,
Until the day I learned love means nothing.
   How does a heart find strength to persevere,
   When forever doesn’t mean forever?