04 May 2021

Heaven Help Me

By Bud Koenemund

(Written: January 2021)

Heaven help me, I get lost in your eyes;
My mind enchanted by those circled orbs –
A maelstrom of fantasy spinning – while sighs
Escape from lips longing to kiss yours.
Oh, I must confess, too many waking
Thoughts are consumed by daydreams; my focus
Struggling ‘gainst grace; Reason’s forsaken,
Abandoned to a barely disguised lust.
Yet, even this concupiscence is pure –
A respect undimmed by base desire –
And my heart requires no other cure
But passion, for which I’ll risk Hell’s fire.
   I do revel in thy beauty endued;
   Treasuring ev’ry moment spent with you.

03 May 2021

Slow Motion

By Bud Koenemund

(Written: December 2020)

Know’st thou that moment in each Romantic
Comedy, when yon fiery mistress
Doth approach the hapless teen male, flicking
To and fro, with careless ease, her lustrous
Mane; while time – defying reason – passes
In slow motion, and said young man does gawk;
Stupefied – as concupiscence crashes,
O’erwhelming intellect – too stunned to talk?
I have known thee beyond thirty moons full –
My heart being surrendered from the first –
And, though I am mad – thought, by some, a fool –
I swear to you, with passion unrehearsed:
   When I see thee, my entire world stands still;
   Struck dumb, as heavenly choirs trill.

02 May 2021

Believe in Love Again

By Bud Koenemund

(Written: December 2020)

I will help you believe in love again;
Make thee feel adored and celebrated;
Safe enough to surrender; free of pain;
Sans sorrow; through my affection sated.
I’ll gather the pieces from your broken
Heart; combining them with such remaining
Parts of mine; building a fire which mends
Both – forged as one by passion unrestrained.
My soul’s quest shall be to make you smile;
Holding thy hand while healing the spirit.
Let not these flowery words beguile
Your eyes – those orbs I can never forget –
   But, trust in my actions, for they will prove
   This respect and devotion ‘ever true.

01 May 2021

Affection's Embers

By Bud Koenemund

(Written: November 2020)

It may sound hyperbolic; cliché;
Or, like silly sentimentality;
But, when I see you, the Sun appears; it’s rays
Spreading warmth through my soul; a quantity
Of joy absent for decades; sparking light
In a spirit abandoned to darkness.
Your grace kindles desire and delight;
Arousing love lost in a wilderness,
Frozen near to death – now granted new life.
Dare I hope for ecstasy? While the head
Urges caution, my heart has forgot strife –
Seeking a future of passion instead.
   Despite the past, affection’s embers glow;
   Requite my care, and make this fire grow.

30 April 2021

Stuck in the Middle With You

By Bud Koenemund

(Written: October 2020)

Every word I’ve written thee is true –
My passion sans deception. Be assured
This heart remains dedicated to you:
The affection pledged innocent and pure.
But, sometimes I feel lost; directionless;
Wanting guidance. Lacking thy confidence,
I’ll find myself in the same wilderness
Where, once upon a time, indifference
Starved this soul near death. Yet, Lady; I know
Your past and mine that way are kindred.
Though, in life, we have both paid heavy tolls,
I pray, together, love grows unimpeded.
   While insecurity conspires to
   Deceive, it cannot dim respect for you.

29 April 2021

Complicated

By Bud Koenemund

(Written: September 2020)

Though I may be thought a fool to reveal
Desire – once more exposing my mind
To misery; tearing scars barely healed
After injuries caused by one unkind –
My soul yearns for thee, regardless of chance!
Ignore the torment in our pasts, and stand
With me. Please forgive this awkward advance,
And, grant the honor of holding your hand.
I, here, offer love willingly, despite
Complications which life can oft’ present;
Endeavoring to make my heart respite
For thine, with affection incandescent.
   Through storms of time, this promise will endure:
   Always and forever in passion pure.

25 February 2021

Stupid

By Bud Koenemund

Sadly, regarding matters romantic,
I have rarely lacked for stupidity;
While love turns my nature sycophantic,
No lady requites this avidity.
Madness arises as passion displays
Intensity in emotion – all or
Nothing; the only way I know – unswayed
By complications; my vow: to adore.
Though defective Reason cannot excuse
Patterns that seem an addiction to pain,
The mind suffers when a heart is abused;
Leaving senses suspect, and doubt ingrained.
   For my ignorance, time will grant no cure;
   Nor patience, this agony, to endure.


28 December 2020

Voices

By Bud Koenemund

The voices are always louder at night;
When I’m alone; vulnerable to their
Influence; criticism which ignites
Self-doubt and –hatred; heightening despair.
Too oft’, these condemnations seem substance:
“You’re not worth affection.” “Who could love a beast?”
“She’s out of your league.” “You have no chance!”
“Why try?” “Just give up, and accept defeat.”
The enemies inside grow insistent –
A treason battering weak defenses –
Overwhelming what little resistance
I can offer to protect my senses.
   How does one combat a mind seditious;
   Obscuring reason with thoughts malicious?


21 September 2020

The Woods are Lovely, Dark, and Deep

 By Bud Koenemund

It’s sneaky, see? Re-appearing when least
Expected. I’ll be happy for a while;
Then, suddenly, devoured by the beast;
Sanity made hostage to thoughts vile.
Although darkness offers comfort – release
From frustration and pain – the depression
Lies; breeding torment rather than peace;
Promising a void unknown as solution.
This is the conflict raging through my mind –
Each day I wake another battle won
Against myself. Yet, even triumph finds
Reason dragged closer to coming undone.
   True, I oft’ crave the ease of surrender;
   But, trials and woe remain ‘fore slumber.