When Forever Doesn't Mean Forever

By Bud Koenemund

Words often evolve over centuries;
Rising and falling while meanings altered.
Some are lost in language’s vagaries,
Disappearing, to be re-discovered
In not-always-ancient texts; re-defined –
Even the victim of mistranslation –
Gaining life hence as lexicons refine;
Embraced for use by new generations.
But, I believed one word inviolate;
Sacred and immune to fate’s quickening;
Spoken always without fear or regret,
Until the day I learned love means nothing.
   How does a heart find strength to persevere,
   When forever doesn’t mean forever?

Heaven Help Me

By Bud Koenemund

(Written: January 2021)

Heaven help me, I get lost in your eyes;
My mind enchanted by those circled orbs –
A maelstrom of fantasy spinning – while sighs
Escape from lips longing to kiss yours.
Oh, I must confess, too many waking
Thoughts are consumed by daydreams; my focus
Struggling ‘gainst grace; Reason’s forsaken,
Abandoned to a barely disguised lust.
Yet, even this concupiscence is pure –
A respect undimmed by base desire –
And my heart requires no other cure
But passion, for which I’ll risk Hell’s fire.
   I do revel in thy beauty endued;
   Treasuring ev’ry moment spent with you.

Stuck in the Middle With You

By Bud Koenemund

(Written: October 2020)

Every word I’ve written thee is true –
My passion sans deception. Be assured
This heart remains dedicated to you:
The affection pledged innocent and pure.
But, sometimes I feel lost; directionless;
Wanting guidance. Lacking thy confidence,
I’ll find myself in the same wilderness
Where, once upon a time, indifference
Starved this soul near death. Yet, Lady; I know
Your past and mine that way are kindred.
Though, in life, we have both paid heavy tolls,
I pray, together, love grows unimpeded.
   While insecurity conspires to
   Deceive, it cannot dim respect for you.

Lost in Translation

By Bud Koenemund

For "Her."

I sought to place you on a pedestal –
Enskied – the sun candescent 'gainst my dark;
Thinking you a being celestial;
An angel igniting the divine spark.
Desiring to shield you from a world
Of slings and arrows aimed at sanity,
Leaves my soul craving grace as madness whirls –
Begging one kiss to void profanity.
This wish to protect never meant possess –
Locking you away in tallest towers.
And, though some fear by worship I obsess,
My heart aches on, praying passion will flower.
   Often by words emotion can augment,
   But love unrequited breeds discontent.

Crazy Again

Here's to another 15 years.

– "Her"

Fifteen years. Fuck me sideways! Fifteen years?!
A lifetime passed; so many chances lost.
When lies and doubt feed on the darkest fears
Of a heart, eyes are blind, and trust the cost.
There are no more words in this broken soul;
No rhymes to pen in hope of winning love.
In truth, affection is dead. It's bell tolled
Silently; muted within a cloud of
Dashed dreams disguised as an epiphany.
Madness has once more crept into my brain,
Exposing my yearnings as fantasies –
And granting freedom to rage unrestrained.
   Why must love cause such passion, both when here
   And gone; destroying all that I hold dear?