Fire Cannot Feed Upon Itself

By Bud Koenemund

With apologies to Galway Kinnell

Fire cannot feed upon itself. Lacking
Fuel to sustain, it will suffocate;
Dying away – light dwindling toward black –
As flames, once furious, quickly abate.
To make it burn, I threw my whole self in;
Sacrificing pride; nourishing our spark;
Then realized I could never kindle
Passion matching mine; that knowledge a stark
Reminder of the wasteland devotion
Leaves behind – solitude seared in my soul;
Scorched by incendiary emotion,
While embers, neglected too oft’, grow cold.
   The love extinguished cannot be renewed;
   Yet, memory smolders with thoughts of you.

Knowing

By Bud Koenemund

For "Her."

The worst thing about you leaving – again –
Is knowing in my soul you will come back.
Sure as the dark of night and April rain,
You'll return to heal yourself as you wrack
My sanity once more. I fear you'll wait
Until I've somehow patched together a
Heart you've crushed before. Alas, 'tis my fate
To be punished for the sin of love; flayed
Alive by your indifference; my will
Exiled to the wasteland of rejection,
And devotion exposed as a windmill
I charge heedless of my own destruction.
   Passion I held stronger than gravity
   Has yielded to painful lucidity.

Words and Actions

By Bud Koenemund

For "Her."

"If thou dost love, pronounce it faithfully:

Or if thou think'st I am too quickly won,

I'll frown and be perverse and say thee nay."

– William Shakespeare, Romeo and Juliet (2.2)

Why should I believe thy protestations
Of desire, when you let me languish –
Wandering the wasteland of rejection;
Surrounded by solitude and anguish?
Shall I take thee at thy word, while you speak
Of your heart and soul, as my own lie dead?
How can I once more leave defenses weak,
When by thee to misery I am wed?
May I suppose this Spring-like affection
Real, or will fair weather fade under cloud?
My breast remains guarded 'gainst deception,
Though I yearn for passion proclaimed aloud.
   Someday I'll transcend this pain, and admit
   Love found in actions, not promises writ.